Friday, July 20, 2018

Life | An Update; moving + mental health + FFXIV



Hai guys.

I feel like I haven't been here in forever. I honestly think the idea of being the "ideal blogger" with the "perfect photos/flat lays" has seriously gotten to me and it's taking a serious toll on my blog and Instagram accounts.

I try to post photos and updates more freely on Twitter, as much as I can/remember to.

A lot has happened since the last time I was here so I'll try and do a quick recap;




I think I was in the middle of posting my mental health series posts which I did do over on PLACES & PEONIES which has turned into my nerdy/gaming/mental health blog (I also talk a bit about my experience with taking anti anxiety meds there. I wish I had talked more about it here WHILE IT WAS HAPPENING but for some reason I just... didn't. I regret it now). I created it because while hazearella is suppose to be about me and my life it turned more into a... I don't know. Review blog sort of? I like to keep this blog to talk about the things that usually bring me joy and I don't like writing about my anxiety much here. Thus I created Places & Peonies to be a place where I talk about anything and everything.

So since then I've moved; I had hoped to make another Moving Chronicles series but when you're just moving to another apartment complex across town there isn't much to talk about besides the boring ol' "just spending today packing!" "oh! more packing!" sort of thing. It always amazes me how much stuff you can come up within a year. It's crazy! And I always say I'm going to sort/purge my stuff before I move --- and I never do. Whomp!

The place I had moved out of I had almost no problems with; until the people/person upstairs decided to drop what sounded like weights all night long till about 3-5am. Do you know how irritating it is to be woken up by a loud banging sound upstairs when you already have a slight PTSD about slamming doors?! It seriously made my anxiety skyrocket to the point where I was hallucinating every single day and I couldn't sleep. Partly because of my anxiety and mostly the noise. It got to the point where I was going to bed with ear plugs and music played really loud and I could STILL hear them! After like 4 months I ended up filing a complaint and they said they would send them a warning and if the noise kept going and I complained again it would be a "lease violation". I ended up filing 5 complaints before I moved out because it kept getting worse and worse and I even sighted it under my reasons I'm moving on my move out form.

Then there was the issue of bugs. Since I moved there I would, almost every single morning, find "drain flies" or dead fruit looking flies in my bathtub drain and sink drain. There would also be little fruit flies constantly in my apartment which is weird because if there was food in my trash, I took it out. I never left the door open. I don't open my windows. I didn't have a balcony and my apartment was AT THE END OF A CLOSED HALLWAY. So it was blowing my mind how flies were even getting IN my apartment. Not to mention I was constantly wiping thing down and mopping. Then there was the incident with a roach coming out of my bathroom sink. Then silverfish started showing up which again, I had no idea why since I didn't eat in my room or bathroom and I closed all my drains after that roach incident. Then right before I moved I was having spiders in my apartment?!? Like, how the hell?!? It was seriously annoying af paired with the constant noise upstairs. I pretty much didn't sleep well for months in that damn apartment.

When it came to moving out I didn't get my 90 or 60 day notice. I didn't even get an email. Literally, nothing. One of the ladies who worked in the office was well aware I was moving out as I frequently asked what my last rent amount due was an when my lease ended so when I went to file to move out she told me IT IS IN MY LEASE that if I DID NOT receive a notice from them THEY have to accept my 30 day notice. Imagine my surprise when I went to turn it in and the property manager told me I can't do that and that it says "in my lease that I need to provide them with at least a 60 day notice." She made me change my move out date from July to August. Wtf? Who the hell makes their tenant extend an extra month? Wouldn't they just cancel the lease if that was the case? SO I GOOGLED THIS and I went and flipped my apartment upside down looking for my lease which IT DOES STATE that if I did not receive either of the TWO NOTICES that they have to accept my 30 day notice. The part that irritated me the most was that the manager tried to make the other girl sound stupid when the manager herself doesn't know her own lease?? So I called her and sighted exactly where in her damn lease she lied about. She said she'd change it.

The day after I turn in my last months rent she calls me saying I didn't pay the full amount to which I reminded her WE HAD TWO CONVERSATIONS ABOUT THIS A MONTH AGO. To which she said she'd "check my file". Then comes back to me saying I turned it in at 27 days, not 30. HOLD UP, I know for a damn fact I turned it in at least at 33 days cause believe me, I had it on my calendar when I was getting the fuck out of there. Then she says she'll call me back to double check. After hearing her new assistant (yes the lady who helped me the most ended up quitting before my lease was even up, imagine that) tell me that she was "busy" 3 calls in a row I finally got a hold of her to which she said, "oh yeah I checked it, you're good to go." then why the fuck didn't you call me back and tell me so?! Seriously, dealing with her was becoming a damn nightmare.

When it came to turn in my keys, since they're closed on Sundays (another thing I really didn't like cause that meant NO MAIL, FOR ANYONE since the building was locked) I had to turn it in on Monday but Bubba had work and we were about done with the damn place. Normally complexes charge you for the keys if you don't return them or tell you to leave them in the microwave on your way out. Nope, not this place! They told me that they would charge me a full day every day that I still kept the keys. Again I Googled this since there wasn't much about in my lease except that if it's obvious I vacated my apartment by my lease up date then they couldn't force me to stay or charge me anything extra but again there wasn't anything about terms for the keys in the lease. So I drove allllllll the way back there just to drop off the keys only to have no one even be in the office. The door was locked and the manager even locked out her new assistant! Unbelievable! I'm so damn glad I'm done with that place!

My new place now is amazing. I'm having an awesome time being here, not to mention it's so nice to wake up and not see dead flies in your bathroom every single fuckin morning. When I moved in I even saw they had a roll of paper towels on the counter with a garnish on top of it and the same with toilet paper!



Seriously, how thoughtful is that?!

Also Sophie found her way back to the counters and stove top. Sigh.


They also vacuumed my room for me.

I was seriously going to cry when I saw this!

Before I had moved into the previous place (with the shitty manager) I had requested they vacuum and mop my floor since I was moving from out of state and my stuff was on a moving truck that didn't end up showing up until a damn month later. They said they would. I had requested it because 1) OCD and 2) since my apartment was one of the last one bedrooms it was also slightly a model apartment meaning a lot of people were walking around with their shoes on in there and such.

When I got there they didn't vacuum my floor. It was dirty. And kinda gross. They didn't mop either and there was a dead spider on my closet floor. Seriously so many things that shoulda told me this was NOT going to be a good time. I don't even think they had housekeeping there like they do at my place now. Like the place I'm at now makes me feel like I'm living in some super fancy hotel resort. No joke.

Lemme show you the view from my balcony.


Yes, that's a lazy river. And yes there's JENGA on that table.

They keep their grounds super clean and there's always really relaxing essential oils being diffused in the gym and the aqua massage room not to mention they keep the gym and club house fridge stocked with bottled water that we can take whenever we need.

There's a deli right across the street and there's this amazing taco place also across the street with cheap tacos and Mexican coke.





The deli provides a bunch of healthy foods for grab and go as well as some amazing sandwiches, sides, salads and breakfast plates. They sometimes have dessert. I've found not every time I go they have a wide selection but this day they had White Chocolate Grapefruit Creme Brulee (which was amazing) and Cinnamon Chocolate Bread Pudding.

The taco place has my favorite kind of pickled cabbage in their tacos that's so good with lime on top. Oh goodness. I'm drooling just looking at this picture! Best of all it's cheap! And did I mention Mexican Coke? Like, Mexican and Philippines Coke is the best. Fite me.

Since moving here my hallucinations have stopped. I'm not as stressed out, at all. I'm pretty hopeful in how I'm going to organize and decorate this place and I feel so much better just being here. That's not to say that my mental state has been cured cause we all know that's not how it worse. Despite feeling better and excited and happy for some reason my depression crept back in for awhile. It's not as strong now, but I'm definitely still feeling the lingering after effects.

Because of that I've been spending a lot of time on FFXIV just catching up on things and trying to connect with people I'd talk to sometimes. Trying to make an effort to hang out with people I normally just talk to on Instagram. A lot of my IG friends are split between two different serves on two different data centers. Which kind of makes it hard. If you're on the same data center you can at least run things together but if you're on different data centers there's no way you'll run into each other, at all which kinda sucks. But I've got alts everywhere so... it's fine. It's cool. They're just not my main, that's all.

On my main I finally got all my gathering classes to 70 (the max level) which means I got my all gatherers title!


I know... Axelyn blinked. Now to get Carpenter, Monk, Astrologen and Bard to 70 \o/.

Meanwhile I'm also working on getting Bubba's White Mage, Botanist and Fisher to 70.

~*~

I'm trying to get back into reading and blogging and I even have a few ideas for some YouTube videos I want to film some time soon! Mental health can be so tricky and so wish-washy. I'm glad I have a man by my side who will do whatever he can to make sure I'm comfortable, the least anxious as I can be and in a space where I'm filled with as much inspo as he can fit in these walls. It definitely does help!

Here's to hopefully more updates and more blog posts :)

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