Showing posts with label yearly goals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label yearly goals. Show all posts
My onelittleword for 2024;
After an extremely traumatic 2023 finding a word for 2024 wasn't hard at all. I barely struggled with it. And everything that I do within 2024 will reflect this word. Much harder than I've ever done in previous years. Because my healing, my mental health, is not just for me but for my girls too.
Going back to being the mom that I said I'd be when Tums was born. Working hard to avoid situations that'll make me relapse. Avoiding people who seem to be dead set on triggering me and pushing me off my path. And staying away from people who try to tell me what to do or what choices I should be making. People who tell me that my kids "shouldn't" be here are def not people I want to be around.
Making my silence more of a priority. Not answering my phone and not feeling bad for doing so. I don't need to reply to every message, text or phone call. Especially if I really don't want to.
And if this makes me sound selfish, then I guess that makes me selfish but I'm literally done caring. Because nothing is more important than MY happiness and my girls having a mom who isn't always in a bad mood.
I haven't put much thought into any specific resolutions, just focusing on getting better and recovering my mental health. I've gone way too long letting it suffer and enduring the opinions of other people. I need to get back into taking control of my life and what I want instead of worrying about upsetting other people cause that isn't the move and I don't know why I ever thought it was. In the end the ones to suffer were my girls and I'm never letting that happen again.
Wow, I thought I had posted this here... but I guess I didn't. Whoops. That's a first of missing it.
2021 was better than 2020 for sure.
I got to see my BFF and spend my birthday with her at Disney World after not seeing her for 15 years. I also got to see my girl Alexis and it was our 10 year anniversary since our Disney College Program. It was so nice to see them both. I also got to go back in November for Christmas time stuff as well as hit Universal Studios where I met up with my friend Angely. She's so fun to be around! I'm glad I was able to see her!
The end of 2021 was unexpected for lack of better word. I opened up my shop and it did really well the first and second month. I mean it did pretty well all the rest of the year but the sales I made exceeded what I thought would happen. I'm thankful for the sales and the learning process that it took to launch my shop. It's been fun learning... well... everything. And having another outlet to express myself.
I got to spend more time with my Kuya Dru despite his crazy work schedule. Me and this dude have a crazy friendship history that spans all the way back to when we were 14 and freshmen in high school. I'm absolutely thankful for all these years of friendship (23 years of having to deal with my bullshit... and it's been a lot of bullshit) and having his guidance and company.
This year I want to focus more on balance.
Which is something I've struggled with especially since giving birth. I'm thankful for the ways I learned how to create balance between being a mother to a very active toddler and balancing a whole ass business. I lost a lot of sleep... but it was def worth it.
I want to focus more on balancing the things I want out of life and making them happen. 2021 showed me I'm capable of the things I know I'm capable of... I just have to want it and manifest it and keep my vision clear and unclouded -- that's the hard part.
Here's to 2022 and working more on myself and creating the life I want.
Did you pick a word for 2022? I'd love to know if you did in the comments below!
Last year I wrote about the Things I'm Leaving in 2020 and I thought it would be kind of fun to do this again. I know it's a bit similar to intentions and goals but I feel like you can never throw your intentions into the universe too much. There are going to be a few repeat's on this list but we'll see how many times I gotta this ish down before I get it through my thick ass skull. Shadow work. Leggo.
| Not making my health a priority
I really had so many intentions on fixing this one and while I sometimes managed to get back on track, I'd also fall off just as fast. Living in TX is really challenging for this one, I mean it doesn't HAVE to be but I'm def struggling with it especially when it comes to eating better. I truly believe that the things you eat, the entertainment you consume and the amount of physical activity you're into all have something heavy to do with your mental health.
Speaking of mental health, I'm leaving behind the fear or laziness of doing Shadow Work. Of being my own source of therapy. Of avoiding my own therapeutic hobbies because ya girl needs to reconnect with herself. I feel like I lost touch of myself after I gave birth two years ago, I've low key been too scared to examine that so I just haven't. But I need to, cause if I don't, how will I know where my direction is?
My health -- all aspects of it -- should be my highest priority.
| Hoarding
I literally don't even want to talk about this endless life long struggle. It all started as a kid. And I haven't been able to fix it because it also triggers anxiety. I low key hate finding favorite things/foods/products because if the shit ends up discontinued I get super sad. I mean, isn't that suppose to be the fun of discovering favorite new stuff? Idk, it's weird.
I get buying back ups of things that I use daily. Like cleaning supplies. Or like, hygiene stuff. But there other stuff like snacks, makeup... yeah, that habit has got to go. Especially when it comes to makeup, while I did enjoy collecting makeup once upon a time... we're not in the fairy tale forest anymore. And Tums likes to just WRECK my makeup. She doesn't know any better, I remember what it was like as a kid and fuckin up my mom's makeup just to "see what would happen". So I really can't blame her. But I also shouldn't have makeup that I have no intention to use either??? I get being in that mindset when I was younger but now that I'm older with a kid, it really puts things into perspective.
| Selling myself short
Another life long struggle of mine. If there's anything 2021 has proved to me it's that even if I feel out of touch with myself, it hasn't changed my drive to create or better myself. It's harder to see these things in yourself, but my friends have been constantly reminding me this year that I can do everything I want and that I make things happen.
I need to leave behind the ideal that I "can't" do something. Tums has started saying she can't do something when I know she can. I need to start believing in myself the way my friends and Tums do, because I know I CAN be capable of so much but I spent this year telling myself I wasn't. And while 2021 turned out better than I expected, I did carry a lot of self doubt. Imagine if I hadn't.
I'm not saying I'm going to walk around thinking I'm the shit at everything, but def at least the things I KNOW I'm the shit at. Or at least ditch the idea of self doubt when it comes to a project or a job.
| Avoiding rest
I tend to work nonstop, I don't know how to take a break or to rest. And within the last year I have even stopped taking my daily bubble baths just because I just don't feel like I have the time anymore to take them. I have stopped everything that was used as a hobby of rest. The only days I have to even sleep in are Sundays, so that's what I do. But even then, the rest of Sunday is spent catching up on things or doing laundry and cleaning the whole apartment while there's no one there to bother me.
I know this one is going to be hard to fix; But I really want to make rest a priority, I guess it goes hand in hand with keeping my health also a priority.
| Avoiding conflict
I recently found out this is a trauma response. I like to think I've learned how to pick my battles. But I know there are some situations where I need to say my shit. And I still don't. I almost physically can't and I use to be SO good at starting conflict so how did this happen? Who hurt me? Oh, right, my narc ex who would gaslight me in circles and make me feel like I was losing my mind for trying to stand up for myself. And if that wasn't enough, when he ran out of fake reasons he resulted to physical abuse.
I'm not exactly sure how I'm going to undo this since it's one of those things that are kind of just lodged in your brain and when the chance to participate in conflict comes up, your brain just stops. I'm trying to be better at standing my ground again, but the times when I really need to, I still struggle with it.
I do make it known my boundaries are solid. And even that can get arguments started, but it's a start in standing up for myself.
Never thought I'd miss being the reckless angry kid who just burned bridges for fun.
| Using shopping as a stress reliever
This is one of my favorite toxic traits. I know, that sounds freakin horrible, but it's true! My dad use to tell me that I either need to control my spending or marry someone who makes enough money to support my insane spending. I was like 21 at the time. Not much as changed since then.
I don't shop as much any more. Mostly since I lost all my high limit cards, but I still need to be more mindful of the things I buy and no just go crazy since I have the money to. I did pretty well about it in 2021, until I lost Sophie. Then I just went on a weird shopping rampage, as if that was going to make me feel better.
I need to find/adapt healthier ways to ease stress, for sure.
| Keeping up with people who don't matter
Guilty pleasure right here.
It's definitely not as bad as it use to be. I don't find much time to check up on people who aren't in my life any more. Low key thankful I'm that busy now to not find time for it. But in the dark moments when I allow my darkness to just run with shit I find myself doing just that.
And honestly, there's no good reason to even spend my energy and mind space on things that won't move my life and goals forward. They're not in my life for a reason and that is totally fine. That happens. We out grow people. We change, so our circle will eventually change. That's just life. There's no epic reason to why sometimes we fall out of touch with some people and there's sometimes not epic reason to why these things just happen.
Despite knowing this, I still play the did I do something wrong complex when I really shouldn't. And even if I did and they decided to just ghost me instead of talk it out? Then whatever. Why should I care. We fight for the relationships in our lives we want to keep and if someone doesn't find value in a relationship with you, then they don't. There's 7 billion people in this world. Like???
I really need to spend that time (no matter how little time that is) improving myself and my life.
What are some things you're leaving in 2021?
I posted a 6 things I learned at 36 blog post on my mental health blog so I won't recap that here. But I will talk about being 36.
I always thought that I'd have my life pretty much figured out at 25. I had all these goals and plans and I was so set on achieving them and worked really really hard. But they just didn't happen. And that's when I realized that just because you plan for something and want something doesn't ALWAYS mean you'll get it. To trust the universe when it tells you this isn't your path. Because it usually leads to bigger and better things.
My life didn't actually start until I was 30. I did achieve my ultimate dream of working for Disney at 26 but beyond that, most of my LIFE LIFE didn't start until I was 30 and able to be by myself.
I got to spend my 36th birthday at my favorite place: Disney World. It's also the 10 year anniversary since my first Disney College Program. My BFF flew from CA to FL just to spend the weekend with us and finally meet her goddaughter and I got to spend the whole weekend laughing so hard I damn near almost lost my voice. It had been 13 years since I last saw her, it was so good to see her again.
I got to see a few of my favorite Floridians and I'm so thankful I was able to. I miss everyone so much. I miss the Disney life. I miss Florida and the humidity. I miss feeling like I belong and I'm welcomed somewhere. I say this all the time -- TX isn't my home and probably will never be viewed as "home". There's too much negativity and too little here that stimulates me. I'm never bored, ever. But TX is boring and that's pretty... sad.
I'm inching closer to 40 so I need to get my goals locked in.
In my 36th year I hope to;
It’s been awhile, hasn’t it?
Pregnancy caught up with me and then so did postpartum depression. And then I lost my dad. So blogging and social media took a huge back burner in 2019.
I obviously didn’t get to post all the recap posts I wanted to do so I’ll be doing that through out January.
Most of my resolutions this year have to do with wellness so that’s what I picked for my {onelittleword} this year.
A few other resolutions include;
↠ Finish school
↠ Create a space for PPD
↠ Cook more
↠ Financial health
↠ Purchase with purpose
↠ Read 20 books
↠ Project pan
↠ Work on myself — internally
↠ Ignore drama + people’s opinions
↠ Be So confident in my own perception of myself that I won’t believe anything less
↠ Eat better
↠ Create content
↠ Become a Disney content creator
↠ Write reviews
↠ Learn Spanish
↠ Take steps to the 3yr plan everyday
↠ Get back to meditation
↠ Get back to Yoga
↠ Travel 3 times
↠ Do one big act of self care every month
I’m hoping to stop by more often, especially with me wanting to go back to writing reviews.
Here’s to a productive and healthy 2020 ✨!
I can't believe it's 2019... already.
But then again how many of us are saying that this week?!
Every year for the last few years I've done {onelittleword} and for the last 2 years Bubba has chosen my word for me — this year he picked L E A R N as my word for 2019.
As new parents (I can't believe she'll be here in a few months! It's so crazy to think about!) this year we're going to do a lot of learning and I'm determined to not be one of those parents who let their newborn change their life as drastically as everyone says they will.
I've never been friends with the concept of sleep; to be honest I've probably gotten more sleep since BEING pregnant, despite all the discomforts than I've gotten naturally since 2004. Like my biggest excitement is the ability to fall asleep at night WITHOUT sleeping aids as I've been heavily dependent on them to get me to sleep since 2004. Me and sleep just haven't gotten along in a really long time.
In addition to being new parents I really want to get back into learning in general. I still need to learn the rest of French and I want to start learning Spanish. I want to relearn the social media world as well as how to make the most out of my blogging and getting back into graphic design. I want to learn how to bake. How to cook better meals. How to be a better version of myself.
There's much power in knowledge and I feel like the last few years I've been in a haze of just winging things; I want to go back to being that determined person with goals and intention.

I still can't believe how fast 2017 had just zipped by! Is this a sign of getting old?! Years just pass you by? It's almost kinda scary!
It's also been a whole week and let me tell you! I'm so over all these cramps and all this physical pain right now!
This year Bubba picked my {onelittleword} again and this year he picked [ C R E A T E ].
This is going to be interesting!
So the rule is once (or once every two) a week I have to create something. I haven't really put much thought into just what I want to create yet but there are a few things that have been on my yearly goals list for a few years now, like... making marshmallows, crafting a plushie, crafting a beanie, creating a mood board. And I'm sure there's maybe 3 other ones but I can't remember them right now.
So this year will be the year I finally tackle these things.
In addition to that I also have a few other goals I'd like to attempt:
⇢ Attempt to make Filipino dishes
⇢ Attempt to bake something off my Pinterest board once a month
⇢ Work on photography/**food styling photography**
⇢ Get more into bookstagram
⇢ Practice better beauty/lifestyle flat lays
⇢ USE A REAL CAMERA MORE
⇢ Read 36 books
⇢ Meditate/Yoga
⇢ Revamp blogs
⇢ Purge everything that doesn't serve me
⇢ Reorganize kitchen
There were others but again I can't really think of them right now. Bubba also has a goals list of this own:
--- Catch up/pay student loans
--- Finish Batman, Overwatch & DBZ shelves
--- Get one new outfit a month for Hazel and I
--- Watch a movie every other week
--- Finish Autumn's book
--- Play a new game every 2 months
--- Go on at least 1 trip this year
--- Build credit
There's a lot of things we want to see and do and accomplish this year and we're excited to see where this year will take us and what adventures we'll find along the way!
I'm so thankful for his uplifting attitude and his never ending happy vibe, I don't know how long I would had been sitting in my dark hole if he wasn't here to offer the support and happiness to remind me that life needs to keep moving forward even if we're hurting or even if we've suffering, it doesn't mean you have to stick yourself in a dark box. You can still grieve and you can still mourn while still planning to make the most out of your time and yourself.
So here's to 2018 and the adventures that are waiting for us ✨.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)

Social Icons