Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
Showing posts with label goals. Show all posts
I wonder how many of these Hello June blog posts exist on this blog. I do wish I had continued to consistently blog here... but between getting distracted from other blogs on different platforms and being a highly emotional driven person... that just wasn't happening. And I can't beat myself up for that, life is life and consistency in the things we like to do isn't always going to happen. And that is totally okay. Especially when it comes to creating content; content creating is already hard and emotionally taxing as it is, doing it when you're depressed or in a bad place in your life feels impossible.
Granting myself grace has never been easy, and I honestly have never done it. I always expect the most from myself because I know what I'm capable of... but in the moments where I just can't, I shouldn't punish myself.
This blog generates its own traction of thousands of views a month, I assume because it's been here for over ten years. But whatever it is, I'm glad for the views I do get, especially in the months I don't post anything.
I've told myself for the last 2 years I was going to work on healing and each time those plans didn't happen because I have too big of a heart. I can feel myself reverting back to that person who just didn't care as much as she did, and that's not really who I want to be. I care, naturally. That's just who I am. I'm trying to learn to not let other people's deflections, or their demons define me. I'm trying to learn that people act the way they act because of who they are. There's no reasoning or hoping for change, and change that isn't done for yourself is just a show.
This month I want to focus on healing my nervous system as much as I can. Learn how to move forward without still being angry about what's behind me. I want to laugh more. I want to find more things I love. I want to discover new snacks and foods, because that's what makes me happy. I want to share those or taste test them with my kiddo or my husband because that too makes me happy.
I want to go back to falling in love with books, stories that move and change me. I want to go back to writing like I'm running out of time. I want to discover more music. Play more games that I find myself searching their hashtags for on IG in the middle of the night.
I want to open a new shop, one that no one really knows or will know about. I want to create art for myself and the people who find and resonate with it.
I want to keep more about myself, to myself. I've always been a pretty open book and on my blogs, I don't exactly regret that... you don't heal from shutting yourself away, you heal by being more mindful of who deserves your trust and energy. But when it comes to people who know me in real life, I want to keep more of myself and struggles to myself. They've been weaponized by so many people I know in real life that it became extremely discouraging. My husband gave me advice that I still think about today after I had left for the second time: "it doesn't matter how much you cry, beg or bleed, some people just don't care." I don't talk about my husband as much as I should, I use to have him all over this blog. But for someone who's had zero experience with ocd, anxiety and depression... he's good at sensing when something is wrong and he's quick to apologize if he knows it's something he did on accident. I get endless cuddles, hugs and tickles from him and the babies when I'm sad. He's taught them how to be gentle with me and my heart as well. I'm truly thankful.
I would say I want to start cooking, but I always say that and it doesn't happen. I use to be really into Hello Fresh when I'd get Sunday's to myself and I would cook. Or I'd have my husband cook them. And we've discovered so many good ones through Hello Fresh.
I want to start blogging my weekend recaps and my monthly favs again. Along with some of the girls favs as well. I want to revamp my motherhood blog and motherhood accounts.
I want to go back to streaming and talking about video games I love. I shouldn't let someone else's opinion define what brings me joy, especially if that person themselves have no idea what the heck I'm doing or even talking about.
This month I want to work on reclaiming my joys and the things I love doing. I'm honestly excited for myself and I can't wait to see where this will take me.
What are your goals for June?
We are now five months into 2025, where has the time gone? But also, what is taking Fall so long to get here?!
I am thankfully feeling less sick, the maintenance needed to keep me feeling normal sucks. But it is what it is and I don't think fixing this earlier would had made much of a difference, it was going to catch up to me sooner or later. I write it off as part of getting older. It has forced me to focus my life in places that should had taken priority the last few years, and didn't.
I have also been back on working on my usual hustle, it's much more challenging this time around for sure... mostly because the excitement of starting has faded, obviously, and because I now have 2 kids instead of 1 to keep track of while working... or struggling to work.
While it can be challenging, it is also very rewarding.
May Goals;
| Prep for May The Fourth
May The Fourth is something me and my husband celebrate every year since we got together in 2016. Sometimes we go all out and other times we just spend the day watching Star Wars movies and eating pizza. Now with 2 kiddos, we tend to go all out. I do appreciate that he takes this day seriously for me since I've had some horrible memories associated with it in the past.
But it's a day I look forward to every year.
| Add 4 new products to each shop
I have a habit of working on things and just... never posting them lol. I know that makes zero sense, and honestly I can't figure out why I do this either, but I do and I need to stop. I miss the days I would just post/go for it and not even think twice. It's like the perfection of things matters when it really shouldn't.
People won't find you if you don't make yourself known.
| Work on getting Shopify up & running
Me and Shopify have a very long and complicated relationship. There is so much flexibility with Shopify and so much more control over your business... but you're on your own to market without the help of Etsy's search bar. And because there is so much more freedom with how you design your Shopify shop, it can get overwhelming really fast.
However, at this point, I'd like to have that freedom and flexibility.
| Write. More. Gaming. Posts
Again with the taking content and not posting lol. I demo and play a lot of games, especially ones that are in Early Release with the intention of making content and writing about it. It's just... the posting I struggle with lol! A recent trauma has played a part in that for sure, but I'm trying to push passed it.
I started writing for me, and I started long before I met people who discouraged and put me down about it. I started long before they could even learn to type. My audience does not include them, so why let something so small and insignificant stop me from doing something I love?
People who hate on you for your hobbies and interests when they could never even understand what you do is diabolical and says more about their own lack of hobbies and interests than it does about yours. Creators and creatives don't sit around and bash other creatives, that's what sets us apart from the rest.
| Purge kids outgrown clothes
My husband found some newborn clothes mixed into our stuff. Not sure how or why they were there, but they were and it made us wonder what else is lurking in the clothing piles lol. I know I have some of Tums older stuff in one of my hampers from the last place, so I plan on going through that this month and purging the stuff that doesn't fit me or the girls anymore.
At 40, I feel the need to purge different areas of my space and my life. I think every 10 to 20 years it's good to take a look at your life and see how far you've come, where you want to go and who you want to be and adjust accordingly.
I miss doing the things I use to do effortlessly, like reading and blogging. Taking amazing product shots and working with companies. However I want to add create my own company to the list of things I've done and accomplished as well. And while my main shop has been down for some years now, I'm not done with it just yet.
So here's to a productive May and achieving the goals I set out for myself at 40.
Wow, I thought I had posted this here... but I guess I didn't. Whoops. That's a first of missing it.
2021 was better than 2020 for sure.
I got to see my BFF and spend my birthday with her at Disney World after not seeing her for 15 years. I also got to see my girl Alexis and it was our 10 year anniversary since our Disney College Program. It was so nice to see them both. I also got to go back in November for Christmas time stuff as well as hit Universal Studios where I met up with my friend Angely. She's so fun to be around! I'm glad I was able to see her!
The end of 2021 was unexpected for lack of better word. I opened up my shop and it did really well the first and second month. I mean it did pretty well all the rest of the year but the sales I made exceeded what I thought would happen. I'm thankful for the sales and the learning process that it took to launch my shop. It's been fun learning... well... everything. And having another outlet to express myself.
I got to spend more time with my Kuya Dru despite his crazy work schedule. Me and this dude have a crazy friendship history that spans all the way back to when we were 14 and freshmen in high school. I'm absolutely thankful for all these years of friendship (23 years of having to deal with my bullshit... and it's been a lot of bullshit) and having his guidance and company.
This year I want to focus more on balance.
Which is something I've struggled with especially since giving birth. I'm thankful for the ways I learned how to create balance between being a mother to a very active toddler and balancing a whole ass business. I lost a lot of sleep... but it was def worth it.
I want to focus more on balancing the things I want out of life and making them happen. 2021 showed me I'm capable of the things I know I'm capable of... I just have to want it and manifest it and keep my vision clear and unclouded -- that's the hard part.
Here's to 2022 and working more on myself and creating the life I want.
Did you pick a word for 2022? I'd love to know if you did in the comments below!
Oh wow, it's March already?
Anyone else feel like Feb was both the longest and shortest month? It's kinda weird. A lot happened in Feb which is probably what made it feel so long for me. Thankfully we're one step closer to summer. After that weird random snow storm here in Texas I'm MORE than ready for hot humid weather. Or well, as humid as Texas can get, I guess.
The next couple months are going to (hopefully) be exciting (if nothing gets prematurely cancelled). And I really really need a break from chores, life and the mundane.
I'm also convinced that Texas pissed off someone somewhere because all this bad juju coming to TX is not it. First the snow storm, then people losing power FOR DAYS and clean water. Then now this; them lifting the mandatory mask and now allowing businesses to operate at 100%. Like really? Some people are still trying to recover from the dang snow storm but sure, I guess this is more important. What makes it worse is that TX barely took it seriously to begin with. The amount of Texans I know who GOT covid is unreal. Seriously.
AINT SHIT TO DO OUT HERE, STAY HOME. Dang.
Lemme get into my goals before I go on a full blown rant lol;
.
I know this post is a bit late this year but I got caught up in a few other things I'll talk about later!
This is my 5th? 6th? I don't remember; doing OneLittleWord. I always look forward to the New Year to pick a new word. What do I want my intentions to be for the year ahead?
My word for 2020 was Wellness and I think I did a pretty good job letting that word be the focus of most things, though I'm not that lucky every year. So what was a word that was possible to implement into my life?
My mental health was pretty up and down in 2020 which is fine, but I noticed I was afraid of things I had kicked fears of before and that was not okay. I'm trying to take steps forward, not back. I learned a lot about boundaries and saying no. There were also a lot of things I had put off in 2020 that I really wanted to do, but just didn't have the energy to.
It's finally Fall!
Bring on the pumpkins, warm Starbucks drinks, spooky (or if you're like me, spoopy) reads and movie marathons, and orange everything! And if you're lucky enough to live somewhere where the leaves actually change colors this month, just know, I'll be scrolling the hashtag on IG.
Texas doesn't get a change of color until PROBABLY mid to late November. I guess I shouldn't complain since Florida never changed colors lol. Cali is still hands down one of my favorite places to be in the Fall. It's beautiful. But you know what's not? That cost of living tho. That traffic tho. That high ass gas prices tho. I've grown to love seeing gas under $2 lol.
Meanwhile, Tums whos name is actually Autumn, isn't into flashing pumpkins or Wheelers from Return to Oz. I'm going to chalk it up as she's a baby. She's new to this world and its workings. Yup, that's what I'm going with.
We moved.
Cause you know, that's a thing I do every year too. And the first night at the new place was rough. It seemed like nothing was really going right. Then we discover, right before our nightly shower before bed at like 3am we had no hot water. Guys. I have OCD, I HAVE to shower but I just couldn't do it. I was crying at how cold the shower was. But the weird thing is even though cold showers can HURT like 10 mins after you're out you're good. Like what cold shower?! Tums was loving it. She showered with her dad cause I was just not having it and she was laughing and trying to run back to the water even though she was shivering. Crazy child. Then you know, our microwave was missing the rotating disk. And just a bunch of other stuff that should had been ready by the time we got here.
Anyway, it's October which means Blogtober so let's get started!
October Goals;
I know I'm not the only one who can't believe it's already August so I'm not even gonna say it! But what I will say is: I can't believe this pandemic has been going on for about 4-5 months in the US now and we're still nowhere near getting better. If anything we're getting worse and that's insane. But then I run my weekly errands and I see WHY we're getting worse.
Everything is bigger in Texas.
Even the bullshit.
For the first time in ever I managed to wait until the end of July to start Fall. I usually start mid July but I really want to get the Spring/Summer content I missed out on out of the way before I go on full Fall mode. I know it doesn't matter in reality but I just like things to be in chronological order. So let's hope I get all of that other stuff up before August is over, yeah?
It's mostly for me and my archive purposes tbh.
Things I hope to get done in August;
Why yes, this was meant to be a monthly goals post but uh, I tend to talk too much. I wish there was a check list option for bullet points. Come on Blogspot it's 2020!
I can't believe it's 2019... already.
But then again how many of us are saying that this week?!
Every year for the last few years I've done {onelittleword} and for the last 2 years Bubba has chosen my word for me — this year he picked L E A R N as my word for 2019.
As new parents (I can't believe she'll be here in a few months! It's so crazy to think about!) this year we're going to do a lot of learning and I'm determined to not be one of those parents who let their newborn change their life as drastically as everyone says they will.
I've never been friends with the concept of sleep; to be honest I've probably gotten more sleep since BEING pregnant, despite all the discomforts than I've gotten naturally since 2004. Like my biggest excitement is the ability to fall asleep at night WITHOUT sleeping aids as I've been heavily dependent on them to get me to sleep since 2004. Me and sleep just haven't gotten along in a really long time.
In addition to being new parents I really want to get back into learning in general. I still need to learn the rest of French and I want to start learning Spanish. I want to relearn the social media world as well as how to make the most out of my blogging and getting back into graphic design. I want to learn how to bake. How to cook better meals. How to be a better version of myself.
There's much power in knowledge and I feel like the last few years I've been in a haze of just winging things; I want to go back to being that determined person with goals and intention.
I love Tulips.
I'd love if I could afford them right now too, but since I can't. Picture taking will have to do.
It's five days into the new month. Five D A Y S and bills are already fucking me. Ya'll I'm so tired of paying bills. Like it's not even funny how tired I am! I guess that falls back to me and past me and all the dumb shit past me was doing but then again I'm extra mad at past me for not telling those other dudes who were using me to get they own shit!
It's my birth month and I'm never excited about my birthday. I mean I was pretty excited last year since Bubba was spending the week with me at Disney World but generally speaking, I'm never really excited.
I can't do my usual traditions cause I'm not in Florida anymore. Also Bubba started a new job (which I'm really happy about) but he's working on my birthday. I'm trying to be somewhat not a poopy pants about it but let's be real, after I turned 25 without a BA in sight I was just like LORT ANOTHER YEAR OLDER. ANOTHER YEAR FAILED.
And that's definitely NOT the way you should be viewing life.
Granted there's nothing exciting about turning 33, still trying to rebuild your shit and yourself and thinking godammit I should get off FB with all these people and their careers and vacations. Which is why I'm never really on FB anymore. I post what I need to post, stalk who I need to stalk and get off!
This blog post wasn't suppose to be about me, it was suppose to be about my goals for April.
⇢ Read 3 books (and not on the last day of the month)
⇢ Blog more // I know shit can be hard but girl it's your release SO QUIT IT
⇢ EXPLORE more, spend LESS
⇢ Apartment hunting
⇢ Tidy room & closet / purge shit you really don't need
⇢ Sort digital stuff / back up laptop (since it's been like years since you did)
⇢ Get RDM and AST to 60 on FFXIV
⇢ Find something that calms you
⇢ Practice better time management
⇢ Catch up on reviews that need to be written
⇢ Celebrate your birthday... the best you can
I know Bubba puts a lot of effort into everything. And I know it might be killing him that he can't go all out on the day of my birthday this year and that the only thing I asked for was food adventures but I guess when you get older the experiences matter more than getting things. And normally I go on vacation for my birthday --- which I was excited moving closer to the West Coast cause I really wanted to celebrate my birthday in Vegas & Disneyland like I use to when I lived in CA 7 years ago but that didn't work out.
So this year I hope I find a new birthday tradition and I hope I find some enlightenment or motivation to get up and do something MORE. I mean I always want to do more but it's actually doing it lately that's the problem (which was never a problem before, so I'm confused as to why it is now).
So here's to April; my personal restart button.
I still can't believe how fast 2017 had just zipped by! Is this a sign of getting old?! Years just pass you by? It's almost kinda scary!
It's also been a whole week and let me tell you! I'm so over all these cramps and all this physical pain right now!
This year Bubba picked my {onelittleword} again and this year he picked [ C R E A T E ].
This is going to be interesting!
So the rule is once (or once every two) a week I have to create something. I haven't really put much thought into just what I want to create yet but there are a few things that have been on my yearly goals list for a few years now, like... making marshmallows, crafting a plushie, crafting a beanie, creating a mood board. And I'm sure there's maybe 3 other ones but I can't remember them right now.
So this year will be the year I finally tackle these things.
In addition to that I also have a few other goals I'd like to attempt:
⇢ Attempt to make Filipino dishes
⇢ Attempt to bake something off my Pinterest board once a month
⇢ Work on photography/**food styling photography**
⇢ Get more into bookstagram
⇢ Practice better beauty/lifestyle flat lays
⇢ USE A REAL CAMERA MORE
⇢ Read 36 books
⇢ Meditate/Yoga
⇢ Revamp blogs
⇢ Purge everything that doesn't serve me
⇢ Reorganize kitchen
There were others but again I can't really think of them right now. Bubba also has a goals list of this own:
--- Catch up/pay student loans
--- Finish Batman, Overwatch & DBZ shelves
--- Get one new outfit a month for Hazel and I
--- Watch a movie every other week
--- Finish Autumn's book
--- Play a new game every 2 months
--- Go on at least 1 trip this year
--- Build credit
There's a lot of things we want to see and do and accomplish this year and we're excited to see where this year will take us and what adventures we'll find along the way!
I'm so thankful for his uplifting attitude and his never ending happy vibe, I don't know how long I would had been sitting in my dark hole if he wasn't here to offer the support and happiness to remind me that life needs to keep moving forward even if we're hurting or even if we've suffering, it doesn't mean you have to stick yourself in a dark box. You can still grieve and you can still mourn while still planning to make the most out of your time and yourself.
So here's to 2018 and the adventures that are waiting for us ✨.
Holy crap where did the YEAR GO?!
I can't believe it's already DECEMBER!
I also can't believe how long I've actually been away from blogging; I have no real excuse either. Same goes for why I haven't been gaming. I don't know to be completely honest. I feel like days just zip by.
I had plans to do vlogmas (as I do every year) and blogmas this year both of just... didn't really happen. I mean jumping in on the 6th day is better than just NOT jumping in... right?!
I had hoped to be more prepared for Christmasy and Winter videos and blog posts and I've come to realize... my productivity and my drive to be the awesome blogger I know I CAN be just isn't there anymore! I don't know how or why... I do know I had hoped to revamp my social media once I moved and I was so stressed out with how the thing with the movers (I still need to write about) and everything had turned out that I just felt so defeated.
I think that's the problem with anxiety and seasonal depression --- is fighting through that epic defeated feeling in order to get the things done that you want done. And some days can just feel so endless and dark. AND THAT'S OKAY. I'm not gonna beat myself up for it anymore. I didn't FAIL at anything this month, everything is still fine. There's still time.
Even if I am battling a cold and all I wanna do is sleep --- this weekend in particular is going to be devoted to catching up on blogging, taking product shots, vlogging as much of my boring life as I can to put up a video on Sunday and sleeping. Cause I mean, I need sleep.
I don't have very many goals for myself this month and I DON'T WANT goals for myself this month really but I do have a few things I want to make sure is done before this year is over ---
- Figure out a direction for my blog and social media
- Come up with my [ onelittleword ] for 2018
- Come up with a SHORT list of SPECIFIC additional resolutions for 2018
- Research remote control jobs
- GO TO THE DAMN DOCTOR
- Upgrade my glasses (or early next year)
- Get back into meditation
- Get back into night time routine yoga
- Get back into Duolingo
- Get back into making healthier eating choices
- (Basically get back into the mentally healthy plan on things I fell off on)
- TIDY THE APARTMENT
- PUT THE SHIT AWAY
- Go into 2018 a little more ORGANIZED and TIDY
- Read as many books as you can
- Take holiday photos
- Figure out what to bake for Christmas Eve
That kinda seems like a lot but some of them can be clumped together/are things I do together. My anxiety and OCD have been nagging the hell outta me for weeks and it's getting hard to cope with. Things are a little stressful right now but nothing too bad if I'm being honest with myself so I'm confused as to why my anxiety and OCD have been acting up. I've been skipping bubble baths as well in hopes to get to bed earlier/giving myself time to read but I've just been so unmotivated which stinks cause it's December! I feel like I should be inspired like crazy!
Sigh, I guess you can't have everything.
One step and one day at a time.
What are some of your goals this month or goals before the year ends?
It's really no secret that I SUCK AT GOALS this year.
BUT that won't stop me from making them! Cause at SOME POINT on this journey I'll get my driven, busy, GET EVERYTHING DONE --- TODAY attitude back. And until then, the most I can do is give myself something to encourage myself to get up and make a difference.
⇢ Clean out fridge
⇢ Sort kitchen
⇢ Put up Fall stuff
⇢ Organize closet
⇢ Organize bedroom (more)
⇢ Properly re-set up zen corner
⇢ Mop living room
⇢ Exchange unwanted B&BW Fall scents/products
⇢ Do returns/exchanges for Kohls, Macys, etc...
⇢ Work on buying Christmas gifts
⇢ BAKE SOMETHING
⇢ Finish October TBR (FINISH WINTER FOR THE LOVE OF GOD)
⇢ Prep Christmas/Dec posts/videos
⇢ Work on NaNoWriMo
⇢ Try 3 new places
I'm not going to overachieve and try to do things I know probably won't happen but instead do things that SHOULD be happening REGARDLESS that I know my OCD will find reasons to NOT do.
I can't believe how fast Sept and Oct flew by and that I technically have to put up my Halloween/Fall stuff now!
I wish I could blog more about my feelings or my day. I don't know what stops me all the time... it use to be my jam! And it's not like this blog has any particular purpose besides me recording my life. I noticed I stopped blogging on hazearella because I guess I've outgrown the blogger layout. I wish it was on Wordpress but I don't want to go through the headache of switching everything over --- especially the domain. I'm thinking of starting over with a new name, I'm just not sure what! The pressures of Instagram can be very influencing though, I'll admit that. And the fear of starting over completely is scary AND THIS IS WHY I DONT HAVE A SUCCESSFUL BLOG OR CHANNEL CAUSE I KEEP STARTING OVER! Even though I don't have THAT many followers on that blog itself. SIGH. I don't know.
But here's to hopefully a month of catching up, finishing up and getting ready for Christmas and a brand new year.
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